T & A

It's official:

I go on the chopping block for my T (tonsil) and A (adenoid) removal this June 22nd.

The Visit.
First, the nurse took my blood pressure, which was slightly high due to the sauna-temperatures in that office (or so I excused). Then the doc numbed up my nose and shoved a stetho-mometer up there, and I got to look around inside of me; pretty gross, if you ask me. The process numbed my teeth as well, so I asked him to fix some cavities while he was in there, but he said my teeth looked fine (like an ENT doctor would know). While I was signing the waiver that detailed out all the possible risks, there was an ominous "1/1000" next to the side effect of "DEATH". My face paled as I asked the nurse, incredulously, "one in a thousand people die from this procedure?!" She laughed and tried to convince me that this was simply a reference number for their books, to which I responded that we should probably check my blood pressure again. Perhaps the most comical waiver line I've ever had to sign was the one that permitted them to "dispose" of "removed body parts" from the surgery, prompting me to ask the nurse if 1/1000 people wake up with no arms. Finally, on my way out of the waiting room, a threesome of geriatrics were quite unashamedly arguing about sex, effectively murdering my libido in cold-blood.

Fortunate that I live so close to the funeral home.